it's stupid how some people believe that their blogs can be "private" when it's blatantly pinned on the world wide web -- by themselves.
i would like to keep this blog plain and private but i know it's impossible. which explains the name of this blog.

oh well.
at least i can crap my heart out...
the bimbotic-whats-a-girl-to-do way.

it sucks BIG TIME when you have to keep guessing. I think many people have gone through this or are going through it right now but i'm still going to rant and complain and kick and shout. coz it's affecting me. am i not good enough or do i lack something other girls possess? i don't want things to stop at scandals. why can't any of them materialize? it's irritating/disappointing and demoralizing. for instance, *****: mayb it's due to change of environment...at least that's easier to accept than if it were a change of heart.

i don't want to think so much but my brain isn't paying attention.
i just hope i can enter smu quickly and find someone. i don't even want to wish for the ***** scandal to materialize. Guess it would be easier for me to look towards the future den to dwell in the present. i'm not even talking about dwelling in the past.

i don't know why am i emoing now. even he thinks that i don't emo coz my neurotism is supposed to be a low 16%. i told him i'm not the kind that can follow my heart and plunge into something, but that doesn't mean i won't Feel anything.

Girls will be girls. and i'm just a girl.